Published September 28, 2024
As a busy mom, you know how challenging it can be to find time for yourself.
Self-care often falls to the bottom of the to-do list, but it's essential for maintaining balance, joy, and energy.
On this page, I address the most common questions I get from moms about self-care and provide some tips and resources to help you make self-care a priority.
Click on a question to view the answer.
Top questions busy moms have about self-care
- Why do I need self-care?
- How do I get started with self-care as a busy mom?
- How do I find the time for self-care?
- How can I effectively manage my time to include self-care activities in my daily routine?
- How can I make time for self-care?
- How do I get more self-care time?
- How to set aside some time every day for myself and be consistent?
- How do I address having little to no support system?
- How do I address having little to no money?
- How do I practice self-care without feeling guilty?
- How do I get personalized help so that I can practice more self-care?
- Yay! I have time for self-care, now what?
- What are some quick and simple self-care practices that can easily be incorporated into a busy schedule?
- How do we get more people to practice self-care and lead by example for our kids?
- I have a question that is not on this list, what do I do?
Why do I need self-care?
If you’re wondering why self-care is important, here are a few key benefits:
Improved Mental Health and Emotional Well-being: Many moms struggle with the pressures of intensive mothering, where societal expectations suggest they must prioritize everyone else's needs over their own. This can lead to burnout and emotional exhaustion if left unchecked. Practicing self-care helps moms recharge, manage stress, and maintain a healthy mental balance.
Improved Productivity and Focus: Taking time for self-care doesn't just benefit mental health—it also helps moms become more effective in their roles, both at home and at work. By recharging their energy and gaining clarity, they can be more present and productive when handling family and professional tasks.
Setting Healthy Boundaries: Self-care is often misunderstood as selfish, but it's essential for setting boundaries that preserve energy. When moms can confidently set limits with their children and others, they avoid becoming emotionally drained and can engage in their responsibilities more positively.
Modeling Behavior for Children: When moms prioritize self-care, they set a powerful example for their children. This helps children learn the importance of balance, boundaries, and emotional well-being.
Now that we've discussed the benefits - let's get started! Check out my answer to the question: “How do I get started with self-care as a busy mom?”
How do I get started with self-care as a busy mom?
It's great that you want to get started with self-care as a busy mom! You deserve it!
Do you have time in your day to practice self-care?
It doesn't need to be long, but you do need to be able to carve out at least a few seconds for me-time.
If YES, you have time to practice self-care but aren't sure what activities to do - check out this question: “Yay! I have time for self-care now what?”
If NO, you don't have time in your day for self-care - check out this question: “How do I find the time for self-care?”
How do I find the time for self-care?
To make time for self-care, you'll need to adjust how you approach your day-to-day life.
But don’t worry—it doesn’t have to be overwhelming or difficult.
The key is approaching self-care in layers, which allows you to fit it into your life, no matter how hectic it gets.
Here are the three self-care layers:
Layer 1: Fast, anytime self-care—These are quick practices you can do anywhere, at any time. Think deep breathing, stretching, or just taking a few moments to check in with yourself. Even these tiny moments can have a big impact on your well-being when done regularly.
Layer 2: Self-care tied to your routine—These are activities you can seamlessly integrate into what you’re already doing. For example, listening to your favorite music while cleaning or calling a friend during your commute.
Layer 3: Dedicated "me-time"—These are the larger blocks of self-care you carve out just for yourself, like a spa day, a solo run, or time to read a book.
The beauty of the layered approach is that you don’t have to wait for a big, uninterrupted chunk of time (which can feel rare!). Instead, you can start small and build your way up. Even though we often think that only Layer 3 will give us the self-care we need, research shows that consistently doing small practices (e.g., self-care Layer 1 and 2) helps reduce stress and boosts well-being over time.
No matter the layer you choose, small adjustments can create the space you need for self-care. The key is making it work for your life.
So, choose which layer fits your current moment, and remember it’s about finding little ways to care for yourself that fit naturally into your life. No matter the layer, all self-care counts—and those small moments really do add up.
Now that you've picked a strategy (or both!), you might be wondering, “Okay, but how do I actually do this?”
You might expect time-management advice here, but I don’t believe in blanket one-size-fits-all time management tips. Instead, I believe that the best solutions often come from within.
Try this exercise:
- Repeat the phrase "I have all that I need to meet my self-care goals" at least ten times over the next 24 hours. You can set reminders on your phone, reflect on it throughout the day, or do it right after finishing this article.
- Notice what comes up. Ideas for where you can carve out some me-time will emerge. Perhaps if you automate, delegate, delay, or streamline your tasks you'll claw back some minutes for you. You may notice new opportunities to reorganize your day to create a few minutes for a quick break, that delegating age-appropriate tasks to your kids gives you more time for yourself, or that you have some time by yourself daily that you could fit in some self-care. Jot down these thoughts—they’re valuable insights into how you can make more room for self-care.
If you have questions or thoughts, such as “I wonder if it is possible for me to automate this?” or “Is it possible to delegate this to my kids?” or “I hate doing X but have no idea how to get rid of it!”, don't hesitate to contact me. I’m here to support you!
With my extensive background in industrial engineering and process improvement, I’m well-equipped to assist you. I’ve optimized complex scheduling systems at Ford Motor Company and Walt Disney World, worked with numerous small businesses to streamline their operations, and taught system design and improvement at the University of Waterloo, one of Canada’s top universities.
So, in the end to find more time for self-care you don’t need to become an expert in time management, automation, or process design—consider me your personal guide. Feel free to reach out with any questions or ideas you have. I’m passionate about optimizing systems and supporting you in finding balance and joy.
Now, focus on shifting your perspective to uncover self-care opportunities.
If you’re focusing on Layer 1, what self-care activity can you do RIGHT NOW?
If you're focusing on Layer 2, which of your routines can you add in some self-care?
If you're focusing on Layer 3, where can you carve out time for yourself?
Whichever layer you focus on, keep reminding yourself, “I have all that I need to meet my self-care goals,” and see what ideas emerge to help you live a more balanced, joyful life. I'm excited for you!!
If you see spaces for self-care in your day but aren't sure what activities to do - check out this question: “Yay! I have time for self-care now what?”
If you want help on this journey or are feeling resistance —thoughts like, “This won’t work for me” or “I don’t have the money or support I need for self-care”—check out my answer to the question, “How do I get personalized help so I can practice more self-care?”
How can I effectively manage my time to include self-care activities in my daily routine?
Great question! Check out the response to “How do I find the time for self-care?” for guidance.
How can I make time for self-care?
Wonderful question! See the answer to “How do I find the time for self-care?” for instructions.
How do I get more self-care time?
Fantastic question! Check out the response to “How do I find the time for self-care?” for guidance.
How to set aside some time every day for myself and be consistent?
Great question! See the answer to “How do I find the time for self-care?” for instructions.
How do I address having little to no support system?
It can feel incredibly isolating when you don’t have a strong support system.
You may not have a lot of supports, but you have YOU and that is all that you need. I promise you.
Focus first on finding time for self-care, reading my answer to the question: “How do I find the time for self-care?” will help.
If you have time to practice self-care but aren't sure what activities to do - check out this question: “Yay! I have time for self-care now what?”
How do I address having little to no money?
It can feel debilitating when you feel like you don't have the resources to do what you want in life.
You may not have a lot of money, but thankfully self-care doesn't have to be expensive. I promise you - you have all of the money you need to practice more self-care NOW.
Focus first on finding time for self-care, reading my answer to the question: “How do I find the time for self-care?” will help.
If you have time to practice self-care but aren't sure what activities to do - check out this question: “Yay! I have time for self-care now what?”
How do I practice self-care without feeling guilty?
Oh my, I can definitely relate to this! It’s so common to feel guilty about taking time for yourself, especially when you’re used to prioritizing everyone else.
One strategy that’s been helpful for me is: feel the guilt and do it anyway.
A dear friend, Johanna Lynn, encouraged me to try this. At first, it felt super scary, but it really does work!
From my experience, the more you practice befriending the guilt, the easier it becomes to ask for what you need to recharge. Yes, it’s TOTALLY uncomfortable initially, but over time, I felt more balanced and less guilty as a result (and I know you will too).
It’s crucial to remind yourself that self-care isn’t selfish.
We’re often conditioned to prioritize others and neglect our own needs, but taking care of yourself doesn’t make you irresponsible or bad. In fact, the more you recharge, the more you can offer to those you love.
You’ve likely spent most of your life caring for others, so it’s almost automatic to not even stop and think about what you need. And yes, changing that can feel daunting for both you and the people around you.
But here’s the truth: You can still be a responsible mom, partner, and worker—and take care of yourself. Self-care allows you to show up as your best self for the people in your life.
By working through that initial guilt, you won’t suddenly become irresponsible. You’ll still meet your work demands and family needs, but with more energy and presence because you’ve taken the time to care for yourself.
The key is to start small. Begin by claiming even a few seconds for yourself. The more you practice, the more natural it will feel to ask for time to recharge, and the guilt will subside.
And remember, by practicing self-care, you’re also setting a powerful example for your children and the people around you. You’re showing them that it’s okay to value yourself and that caring for your own well-being is not only important but necessary.
If you want to have some support as you practice befriending your self-care guilt, I encourage you check out my answer to the question, “How do I get personalized help so I can practice more self-care?”
How do I get personalized help so that I can practice more self-care?
Adding self-care into your day on your own can feel overwhelming, even impossible at times—that's why I created a supportive space to help.
Easy Self-Care for Busy Moms is a nurturing community where ambitious moms come together to practice self-care with compassion and accountability. If you're seeking a group of like-minded women who understand how hard it can be to fit self-care in, are ready to lift you up, and help you overcome roadblocks while celebrating your successes, this is the place for you.
I invite you to apply and join this amazing community. You’ve already got a lot on your plate—let’s make self-care easy and fun together!
Yay! I have time for self-care, now what?
Congrats! Now, let’s make the most of it by choosing self-care activities that match your needs in the moment.
The Happy Mindset app is a digital card game packed with fast and fun self-care activities to bring more joy into your day. It's simple to play—just tap a card!
Ready to give it a try? Click here!
No matter which self-care layer you're focusing on, Happy Mindset will guide you to the right activity. You can even adjust the game settings by clicking the grey cog in the bottom right corner of the game to tailor the activities:
Option 1: Activities that Require Your Full Attention
Ideal for Layer 3 (Dedicated “Me-Time”): Select activities like taking a relaxing bath, reading, or enjoying a solo workout. These are perfect when you have uninterrupted time to recharge fully.
Option 2: Activities that Can Be Done in the Background
Best for Layer 1 (Fast, Anytime Self-Care) and Layer 2 (Self-Care Tied to Your Routine): Choose flexible activities like deep breathing or playing music while you cook. These are quick and easy to fit into your daily routine, even when you're multitasking.
Whether you’ve got 5 minutes or an hour, the Happy Mindset app will help you find the perfect self-care activity for your available time and energy.
What are some quick and simple self-care practices that can easily be incorporated into a busy schedule?
Congrats! I'm so happy to hear you have space in your days for self-care. Check out the response to, “Yay! I have time for self-care, now what?” for ideas.
How do we get more people to practice self-care and lead by example for our kids?
I'm with you! I believe self-care isn’t just for you—it's for those around you too, especially your kids.
By showing them that self-care is important, you’re modeling the behavior they’ll carry into adulthood and influence how they see the world (and women).
If you'd like to be part of a movement of ambitious moms that are coming together to practice self-care with compassion and accountability — I encourage you to apply to join my group Easy Self-Care for Busy Moms - click here to apply.
I have a question that is not on this list, what do I do?
Contact me! I'll answer your question personally and then add it to this list!